Not Dreaming Anymore

Sometimes fantasy conflates
With reality
Through dreams

You have her in your arms
Then you open your eyes
And she’s gone

She was there waiting
For you to come with the car
But when you’re there she’s not anymore

When you next see her
She’s in someone else’s arms
Waiting for someone else’s car

All that’s left to twirl
Is your notion of reality
And not her tender curls

All because you are
Not dreaming anymore.


Deep Reality 

Imagine the current reality to be something like overlapping translucent sketch sheets, where each layer is an individual’s perception and his own reality. Some people have stronger minds and stronger wills, so the sketch on their translucent sheet is more distinct. 

Reality is something of an art piece that continually changes, and each person’s mind contributes a part to this ever morphing art piece.

If you actively seek to change your mind and your reality, it may affect the entire combined reality of this world that is made up of many, many sketches, depending on how strong the change is that may cause your own sketch to be more distinct and prominent. 

The universe is made up of all of the time-less art pieces that are made up of countless sketches, of all living beings and existences past, present and future. All of these art pieces co-exist together to form a complete picture, each art piece a different reality of different outcomes and possibilities. If you have strokes that are clear, focussed and powerful, the universe could just shape a master piece of artwork around you and allow you a glimpse of all the art pieces that makes up the complete picture that is the universe itself. 

You will then no longer be a sketch piece; you will be an observer of this process, and a witness of existence. 

We Run

We run, and we run. We run all the way across the parade square, to the spot where our younger selves used to sit. 

I’m in brown again, no longer the military green that I was clad in a moment ago. I feel like I’m in all white back in my junior college again, a proud young man ready to take on the world at breakneck speed. 

I look around, and I notice this isn’t the elevated parade square of my recent two soaring years. This is the parade square of my childhood years, an old but happy place of endless running and jumping. A place where I felt (and still feel) truly free.

We reach our spot, and we giggle like we used to all those years ago. Silly we seem, but happy we are. 

“Here?” I ask with a smile spread across my face.

“Yeah, here” you reply with a sincere laughter.

 I never felt free like this in a long time.

The next thing I knew, 8:40am. Blue stained sheets, old yellow blanket. I groaned, as all sense of happiness and freedom vanished into thin air in an instant. 

Everyone Needs A Best Friend

(My apologies for not writing anything for a long time; military life is indeed very time consuming and leaves little time even for rest. With whatever little space I have to myself during the weekdays, I have not been able to squeeze in space for any writing so let’s see what comes up on a Saturday morning at seven yeah? Have fun everyone, it’s the weekends!)

All of us do get stuck at one point or another:
Points where our compasses swing in all directions and our watches tell a foreign time,
Times when our hearts and minds are not facing the same direction,
Scenes where we stand rooted at the spot with brewing anxiety and unease;

Then the nightmares set in:
We get recurring dreams of getting lost or running away,
Like a reflection of reality we cannot find our bearings or escape fast enough,
Yet we really do not know what we truly are finding or getting away from;

Where has our clarity of mind vanished to?
What has become of the answers to our enquiring prayers?
When is it time for us to get a grip and turn around to face our fears?

I invite you now to reach out your hand and hold on to this person:
This individual in your life whom you can call when you’re feeling scared at three a.m,
This someone whom you seek advice from when faced with diverging paths,
This person whom you ask out for a cup of coffee when you’re feeling down;

I believe this is the very hand that will
Ease your fears and warm your heart when the thunders roar at night,
Take your hand and walk with you along one of the paths all the way to the end,
Bring a smile to your face and lift your spirits when things head downhill;

If at this point you realize that this piece of writing is disjointed and messy,
Do not worry for I can summarise one and twenty lines into a single line,
Presented on a platter with a colon and a space in between:

Everyone needs a best friend.


(Just a quick one before bedtime)

‘Someday I’ll be happy’ were the words leaving her lips,
I just stopped there mid sentence and I thought to myself,
‘This someday she mentioned, where is this someday anyway?’ 

This probable affirmation which just left her lips (it’s not a time yet),
O just an empty space of nothingness and silence in reality,
Does she know now that this place (if so time) does not exist,
That she is creating all this simply in the deep of her mind?

Someday – well why not today?
Whence will this someday come if today is not lived for all that may?
That today was the someday of another day,
Now what of the present will this future of the past say?

Well that’s it – good night, sleep tight, and we’ll meet again someday (: 

Between Two Realities

calm, cool night

Sometimes we look at the reality around us and we look at the alternate reality that we play out in our minds and we wonder, which is the better form of reality that we prefer? (For the sake of this post, I’ll use the term ‘alternate reality’ loosely, non-scientifically and define it as the life in which we imagine ourselves having in our minds that may or may not overlap and layer over reality)

The moment we consider our alternate reality to be better than what is in existence is the point when reality starts getting really unattractive, whether perceived or real. Yes it is of course true that both can run concurrently and not interfere with each other, but the key link here is which is considered the distraction from which. In the alternate reality, everything is possible; we can make anything and everything happen according to our fancies and wishes and nothing is truly too difficult to achieve or obtain in this alternate world. In contrast, there are many limitations in the real world we live in, and many a time many things do not go according to the way we might like them to.

This sets up a contrast between the ease of the alternative against the difficulties of the actual; it lays the opposition of ‘in control’ against ‘out of control’ in the two different yet possibly similar worlds.

Fluffy as these all may sound, it is actually quite simple: how developed your alternate reality is depends on how your reality is. As a start, the alternate reality is probably a manifestation of reality, or more specifically, what is desired and/or not obtainable in reality. The degree of control we have over our lives determines how advanced our alternate reality is; if we have much control over our lives, there is no need for a created sense of control that comes with the alternate reality. If we have most of what we desire in reality, there is no need to create the existence and possession of certain things and people in our alternate reality simply because we already have them to begin with and thus need not supplant or replicate what is real and substantial to be unreal and make-believe.

Two ways to look at this. First, you can consider the alternative as a detraction from the real since it distracts you from achieving whatever you desire because you choose to falsely believe you possess what you desire by planting it into the alternative rather than actively pursuing it in real life. The other manner of looking at it is that if there are certain things in which you lack in real life, there is no harm in indulging in the created reality that you actually have it and just enjoy it in a daydream; this potentially can make you happier because the lack/void is filled up artificially.

Now you’ve spotted the keyword. Artificially. Sad to acknowledge, but the alternate reality will always be an artificial creation that is unlikely to spill over into reality (much as we might wish for it to). It is definitely healthy for us to indulge a little in a world in which we have control over everything, but the point when it starts getting unhealthy is when it causes us to be delusional and leads us to be unable to distinguish between what is real and what is imagined. That is a sign of excess and is an indication that the alternative has a hold over reality.

Perhaps the important first question to ask yourself is:

would you give up reality as it is and choose instead to live out the one in your head?


Sometimes I stare right into your eyes and wonder, 
If all of this is real and if I really know you at all,
Or are these just the workings of a beautiful and surreal dream?

Sometimes the lens of the camera does zoom out for a moment,
And I see two figures immobilised by time looking into each other’s soul, 
Colouring the scene undeniably a distinct blur of fantasy and reality; 

Is it a sense of Déjà vu,
Something between just me and you?