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I will not allow
What I have built up
To be torn down;

I will not allow
Anything to come between
What I seek and desire.

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Feelings and Music

If I can translate
Feelings into Music:

The lyrics would be
Lovelier than John Lennon’s

The delivery would be
Better than Leslie Cheung’s

The tunes would be
Nicer than Don Mclean’s;

This is all because
I would sing every song

For you.

To No End

I’m glad
Perhaps the timing is right
Maybe it’s a coincidence
But I’m still glad;

Glad that it makes a difference
Even in some small way
To put things back on track
To make things right again;

I think I can smile at this
Many years on perhaps
That maybe I did change things
Hopefully for the better;

A phase maybe (I don’t know)
I can’t even be sure which is
But if you tell me it is
I’ll take your word for it;

I pushed for it
Maybe I shoudn’t have
I don’t know really
Why don’t you tell me?

On one hand they disturb me
On the other I feel quite relieved
Yet should such conflicts even exist
To trouble a mind to such depth?

The status quo is comfortable
Thus tis’ easier to ignore
For deep thinking deepens disturbance

To no end.

On Intensity & Emotions

Sometimes (mostly out of the blue)  you get this heavy bout of emotions hitting you simultaneously in the head and heart and you can hardly find a reason for it; all you can do in such instances is to close your eyes, take a deep breath and try to wash the feeling away.

It isn’t always a negative experience though. Sometimes it could just be a wave of weariness hitting you, or just a short shot of leftover emotions that have not completely passed from the previous encounter. It only becomes problematic when it changes your overall mood, or results in a prolonged dip in emotions. 

People who are depressed experience this very often, and it causes their base happiness level to be lower, and usually disrupts and shortens any spell of happiness or positive emotions that they experience. It lurks in the background and threatens to override any form of positivity present. 

Sounds pretty dreadful indeed. There are however counter measures to take if you happen to be someone who experiences this (often or otherwise) injection of negativity. I shall leave you to think of what these methods are for the time being and to devise and share some ideas for the benefit of yourself as well as others. 

To be continued! 

On Solitude & Loneliness 

This one shall be on my pet subject of many years now, and it is on solitude and loneliness (critically, their differences). I have written quite a bit on this topic over the years, and I have somehow become decently acquainted with these two words over the many times I have penned my thoughts down on them.

Perhaps you would disagree with me, but I see solitude as a state and loneliness as an emotion. Why do I say that? Well you can do things and live your life in solitude, and it is solitude rather than loneliness if you do not feel the void or the emptiness as you go about your every day. 

You can certainly say loneliness is a state too, but it is not so if it is not cemented by the intensity of the aloneness that you feel. Fundamentally, loneliness can be referred to as a state induced by the feeling of emptiness or a deep desire for affection and interaction; if simplified, it can also be viewed in its naked light as that very feeling itself. 

On the other hand, solitude is more of a choice that you make with regards to your lifestyle and the way you conduct your life. You may like to do things alone, be alone, live alone, and go about your every day (largely) alone; this is a decision you make and has no resultant or accompanying emotion (yes of course emotions are always present, but you get what I mean). 

As such we can see solitude as a behavioural pattern, while loneliness is a feeling that may or may not accompany this solitude. Given the innate nature of humans as social creatures, it is not wrong to say that all who live in solitude will experience bouts of loneliness once in awhile (with the duration and intensity varying from individual to individual and from circumstance to circumstance), but it is not however true to say that those who are lonely experience states of solitude since loneliness itself is not a choice. 

Solitude is a good thing: we all need time alone with ourselves to better acquaint us with who we are as persons, to better know our natures. The same cannot be said for excesses of it as it most likely would leave a person starved of interaction and affection. Loneliness on the flip side, in any amounts of it, is not ideal as it is firstly a very painful experience, and it could also lead an individual to do things which may have adverse effects on himself or those around him. 

It is good to know the differences between solitude and loneliness. You can then assess for yourself if you are actually in a state of solitude, or if you are using it as a disguise to mask the loneliness that is lurking deep within yourself. Kudos to you if solitude is your preferred way of life, though it is also prudent to acknowledge it if you find that what lies behind it is just a wardrobe of lonely bones and hidden woes.  

Are you enjoying your solitude, or are you unbeknownst to others drowning in loneliness? Take a moment to find out for yourself.