This is exploitation
Of your deepest fears
Of your darkest woes
Of your scariest thoughts;

What is beneath
Will someday surface

What will you do then
To keep from self-destruct?

A catalyst:
That is what you are.

Three steps forward
Perhaps necessitate
One step backwards.


Whichever First?

I just have a few very simple food for thought at this moment to share: 

When something happens, think the emotions arise first, or do you think the thoughts come first?

As a link to the first question, do you then think the thoughts give rise to the emotions or do you think you feel first, and thereafter result in the thoughts?

On a somewhat related note, do you think rational thinking is a result of discomfort and fear, that there is an easing of tension within yourself when you can rationalise something out?

Answer the above three questions and I do venture to think that we can understand ourselves a little better. 

We All Need …….. To Lean On 

pa quick one as always, my window to write is again short. As you can see from the title, I deliberately left the middle portion blank for you to fill it in. See, we’re all dependent somehow, and that is what makes us human. We are not robots or machines,  so that means we have emotions and the capacity to think. We are capable of feeling a whole spectrum of emotions, be they sadness, happiness, or even loneliness (I know ‘lonely’ is as much a state as it is an emotion, so no disputes on this one now haha).

When a bout of sadness strikes us, or attempts to strike us, we try our best to rationalise it away. Our first line of defence against emotions dragging us down is our mind, and boy is it a potent tool. We can talk ourselves out of a bad day, an argument with our loved ones, or even pain that we feel. Our ability to think and rationalise is able to rationally defeat the surge in emotions, and keep them under control when necessary. There will be a group of people who would argue otherwise, but by and large this is true. Our minds are our greatest weapons.

If we however do not have enough willpower to do so, we seek to do so in more physical methods. We can exercise or eat ice-cream to trigger the release of endorphins to make us feel better, or reach for a hug for a similar effect. Such actions act as catalysts for chemical effects to occur within our body that would have a positive effect on our emotional swing or dip in spirits. 

On another front, this idea of delayed gratification (or expectations of later happiness) can work as well. When the projects get tough or the customers queueing up to give you their orders get ridiculously long, we can think of a later time in the short or long run where we would be happy / removed from the current chore or unhappiness we’re faced with. It could be a call / video call (I just discovered FaceTime, I’m a total technology fossil. I digress) with your other half at the end of a long day, or the thought that you’d be heading to law school or a better vocation next year. This distracts us from our difficulty, and the thought itself usually is enough to bring at least a smile to our faces. Besides, how you end the day makes a great difference as to how you evaluate the whole day; you tend to think the struggles are worth it or you might even disregard the rough patches in the day simply because you ended the day on a high note. I can’t stress enough how important it is to go to bed with a smile or a sense of happiness and gratitude. This changes the whole tone of the day, and perhaps what you can remember from the day might just only be the warm feeling you had before dozing off. It is that magical. 

What I want to say is, we all need someone or something to lean on. It could be our mental fortitude, our comfort food, our families, our sense of gratitude, or anything you think you can hold onto. Many people working in foreign lands far from home use the image of a happier time with their families in future as their pillar of strength and support, and you’ll be surprise at how much this empowers the human spirit to achieve feats many think impossible. 

My friend, I suggest we all find something we can hold on to for certainty, so that with all struggles and sadness.. There is something to keep us going in the day and something to keep the smile on our faces on as we doze off to sleep at night.