Memories, Untainted

cool night, drizzling

Good evening, hope the weekend has been restful and recharging thus far; it’s Sunday night and the work is about to start again come tomorrow (there’s a reason why rainy days and mondays always get people down isn’t it? #carpenters reference) It’s been a long month of May and indeed May Day / Labour Day felt just like yesterday though we already are staring at a calendar that shows First of June; do we not believe now that time is relative, seeing how fast May has flown by and how far January seems even though it feels just like a couple of days ago?

A thought came to mind earlier which I found to be rather interesting is the idea of memory tainting. Everything that happened or happens or is to happen will eventually occupy a place in the memory bank at the back of our heads; that is to say everything in the past forms part of our memories, depending though on whether we remember it or not. However, the key point that I want to bring up here is how we relate to, and choose to remember things. 

Many a time we look back at / on (depending which you prefer) a memory and we partially experience that moment in time all over again, semi-reliving that point in the past whether good or bad. (you just recalled something from the past, didn’t you?) That moment might have been beautiful, that’s why you remember it and constantly seek to return to that moment through allowing memories of it flood your mind; or perhaps it was a painful moment and it is troubling you unnecessarily that’s why it’s playing through your mind every now and then to remind you of that hurtful incident. 

Now the moment has passed and you cannot do anything about it, true? But what you have are memories, and that is something which you can alter and edit. You see, the way we remember incidents and events are not objective; they are subjected to the mindset and emotions when we call upon those memories and the way we remember them are inevitably affected by the conditions upon which we pick up contents from our memory banks. When you look back upon your childhood, your perception of that time period is very often affected by the lens in which you view them, that is the state of mind and feelings when you revisit those memories. You might inject reasons to turn lovely memories into unhappy ones, or change sad ones into bearable ones depending on how the lens you are or choose to view them with. 

Sometimes it is necessary to change the way you remember certain things in order not to be excessively bothered by it, and yet it is also crucial sometimes to remember incidents as closely as they were so that any recount of it will stick as true to reality as possible. Memories can be honeyed or they can be poisoned, and the incident itself has little bearing once it’s over but the way you remember it can often determine the way you feel towards the incident when you look back at it at a later time. 

The most common form of this is to remember happy moments as true and make every recollection be as close to how it was as possible so that these moments can be as realistically relived as possible and the happiness felt can be repeatedly experienced each time the memory is recalled. As for the not so positive incidents, we tend to remember them in a way which makes us feel better about it, about ourselves so that they would not continuously haunt us whenever the memories flash in our minds. It is at it’s core both a defence mechanism which we can selectively employ to ensure we are not too affected by the past as well as a tool which we can use to comfort ourselves through recollecting a better time in the past when the present gets tough. 

Are you thinking of how you remember a particular moment or incident now? 

Memories, untainted. 

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