Between Two Realities

calm, cool night

Sometimes we look at the reality around us and we look at the alternate reality that we play out in our minds and we wonder, which is the better form of reality that we prefer? (For the sake of this post, I’ll use the term ‘alternate reality’ loosely, non-scientifically and define it as the life in which we imagine ourselves having in our minds that may or may not overlap and layer over reality)

The moment we consider our alternate reality to be better than what is in existence is the point when reality starts getting really unattractive, whether perceived or real. Yes it is of course true that both can run concurrently and not interfere with each other, but the key link here is which is considered the distraction from which. In the alternate reality, everything is possible; we can make anything and everything happen according to our fancies and wishes and nothing is truly too difficult to achieve or obtain in this alternate world. In contrast, there are many limitations in the real world we live in, and many a time many things do not go according to the way we might like them to.

This sets up a contrast between the ease of the alternative against the difficulties of the actual; it lays the opposition of ‘in control’ against ‘out of control’ in the two different yet possibly similar worlds.

Fluffy as these all may sound, it is actually quite simple: how developed your alternate reality is depends on how your reality is. As a start, the alternate reality is probably a manifestation of reality, or more specifically, what is desired and/or not obtainable in reality. The degree of control we have over our lives determines how advanced our alternate reality is; if we have much control over our lives, there is no need for a created sense of control that comes with the alternate reality. If we have most of what we desire in reality, there is no need to create the existence and possession of certain things and people in our alternate reality simply because we already have them to begin with and thus need not supplant or replicate what is real and substantial to be unreal and make-believe.

Two ways to look at this. First, you can consider the alternative as a detraction from the real since it distracts you from achieving whatever you desire because you choose to falsely believe you possess what you desire by planting it into the alternative rather than actively pursuing it in real life. The other manner of looking at it is that if there are certain things in which you lack in real life, there is no harm in indulging in the created reality that you actually have it and just enjoy it in a daydream; this potentially can make you happier because the lack/void is filled up artificially.

Now you’ve spotted the keyword. Artificially. Sad to acknowledge, but the alternate reality will always be an artificial creation that is unlikely to spill over into reality (much as we might wish for it to). It is definitely healthy for us to indulge a little in a world in which we have control over everything, but the point when it starts getting unhealthy is when it causes us to be delusional and leads us to be unable to distinguish between what is real and what is imagined. That is a sign of excess and is an indication that the alternative has a hold over reality.

Perhaps the important first question to ask yourself is:

would you give up reality as it is and choose instead to live out the one in your head?

Tis Better to Have Loved

cool, pleasant evening

I don’t usually do regular posts / thoughts-sharing nowadays because I don’t have much to write about, except that for today I have the urge to respond to a blog post I’ve just read. The post talks of how memories forged and attachments grown make moving on and leaving a particular phase or time behind tough. In short, it is saying that it is difficult to let go, of something one has grown so accustomed to, and of people one has become so close and comfortable with. This happens to everyone across different phases and places in life and all that is left after the moment has passed and the people are gone, are the memories in your mind and the warmth within your heart.

I am going to take a chance and run the risk of taking things out of context by introducing a quotation of Lord Tennyson:

“tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all”

  I think it is very important in life that we pursue the things that we are passionate about and spend time with the people we are truly fond of; there is no other way to enjoy moments in life and prevent causes for regret in time to come. I suppose it is good also to immerse ourselves completely into whatever we are doing, to engage fully with the situation and make the most out of the time spent.

The lack of clarity and focus in the photo accompanying the post reflects the memory of that moment: it is like a shadow of the moment, where upon looking back triggers emotions and thoughts, but pales in comparison to what it really was and how it really felt like; somehow the moment can never be fully relived or recaptured again.

Such I suppose is life, where moments past can never be found again and time that once was possessed can never be ours again.

“Neither can the wave that has passed by be recalled, nor the hour which has passed return again”


Sometimes I stare right into your eyes and wonder, 
If all of this is real and if I really know you at all,
Or are these just the workings of a beautiful and surreal dream?

Sometimes the lens of the camera does zoom out for a moment,
And I see two figures immobilised by time looking into each other’s soul, 
Colouring the scene undeniably a distinct blur of fantasy and reality; 

Is it a sense of Déjà vu,
Something between just me and you?



In The Library

You put your head down over your folded arms in the cold hard surface of the wooden table, 
A look of distress and discomfort looms over your face and on your forehead a deep frown is cast,
It is unrestful sleep – I can see worries and troubles hanging over your soul like a burden of the past, 
Yet in my role as a stranger there is nothing I can do but look longingly at you feeling so incapable. 

Kind Words

When people fall or fail,
We offer kind words to them,
Words of encouragement and comfort,
With the hope of cheering them up,
Wishing we can make them feel better,
Trying to partake in their sorrows with them;  

When people soar or succeed,
We (again) offer kind words to them,
Words of congratulations and felicitation,
With (again) the hope of cheering them on,
Wishing (again) we can add to their happiness,
Trying (again) to share in their joys with them; 

Is it to conjure ourselves to try harder,
Or is it to enable the others to feel better? 

In Transition

Some people are forever in transition,
Stopping by places and times but always moving on,
Leaving behind footprints and memories but nothing really much more,
Walking away after the song is over and never waiting for the applause or encore;

Such people are very much like shooting stars that appear in the shadows of twilight: 
They light up the skies for lovers to dance and disappear quietly back into the darkness of the night.